Triggers


As many of you may know, I am a parent leader with Prevent Child Abuse Minnesota (PCAMN).  The work I do there goes hand in hand with the work I do for parents who are stuck in long term court battles, and what I learn from PCAMN is very helpful in all aspects of my business and my life.

I recently participated in a webinar about Emotional Regulation in Parenting.  PCAMN is creating training modules to help parents learn child development and use those skills to become better parents so they do not  resort to violence when they are dealing with stress.  In the future, PCAMN will offer these trainings to all parents who want to learn better coping skills.  If this interests you, stay tuned.  I will let you know when these trainings become available.

Here is something I learned during the webinar and want to share with you. When we discussed self awareness and knowing your triggers, we were asked if we knew what triggers us to react to a situation and what some of those triggers are.  Many people responded that they are not at their best as a parent when they are tired.  This is absolutely true for me.  I can be a real bear when I am tired and it has been the most consistent reason I snapped at my kids over the years as a single parent, with too much on my plate.  The facilitator tonight shared with us an acronym that she uses to stop and think so that she is not easily set off.  The acronym is HALT.  It stands for: Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired.  If you can remember this, you can identify times that you may not handle a conflict or high stress situation very well.  Try to take pause before reacting if your kids are driving you nuts and if you are hungy, angry, lonely or tired, remember that you need to pay attention to those needs and address them so that you do not react badly during those times when you have basic needs for food, rest or support and have not been getting it.

Image courtesy of Ambrose / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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About lifesdoorsmediation

I am a mediator, Life and Divorce Coach and an Instructor of a High Conflict Divorce Program.

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