Let’s Go Over This Again, Shall We?
Ok. Maybe that sounded a little harsh or sarcastic. My apologies. I am having a little bit of a court silliness fatigue. Hey, Court Silliness Fatigue, that could be a disorder I make up and sell to the family courts as a way to change custody! They can give it to one parent based on PAS, and then they can change it to the other parent who absolutely most certainly DOES suffer from Court Silliness Fatigue. I would never do that because I am NOT a sick deranged individual like Richard Gardner and I have a mind of my own. I am not subject to the groupthink of the family courts.
What this post is really about is to talk to you again about how the family court arena is not where you want to live and it is not where you should want your children to spend their childhoods.
I sometimes have clients who want to get a court order to see me or for some other reason, something they want to court to know they are doing. People who have looked bad to the courts want to look good and spend a great deal of time and money trying to prove that they are good. Please do not look to the courts to make you feel good about who you are and what you are doing. Look to your own heart and to your children as a gauge that you are doing the right thing and moving in the right direction.
Have you ever seen where a kid smacks another kid who then smacks the offender back? It is often the kid who retaliates that gets in trouble because that is the exact time that their parent turned to see it. They did not see the catalyst to the controversy and there is most likely no evidence of it. One would think that common sense would tell the parent that something must have set the kid off to smack their sibling, but hey, it is all about what can be seen and what can not be seen.
A way to be free is to free yourself. There really are no court remedies when you have a jerk attacking you behind the scenes of what the court sees. Also, the more you ask for court remedies, the more you get sucked in. Don’t go there unless you have a very important matter that truly warrants court intervention. You will be happier outside the courtroom. If you have one person who is making your life miserable, focus on the many other people who make your life enjoyable!
Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
About lifesdoorsmediationI am a mediator, Life and Divorce Coach and an Instructor of a High Conflict Divorce Program.
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