I Can Only Imagine Movie Trailer

I am very much looking forward to this movie.  It looks amazing!

Many of the people I’ve worked with in the last 20 years are parents who experienced a traumatic family event.  Now, their own children struggle with a similar situation.  My goal is to help everyone get through it in the best way possible, which is not always easy, depending on the circumstances you find yourself in and the mindset of the people who are involved.  Even some of the professionals have scars that they carry, scars that create their own toxic contributions to conflict or family drama.  Still, no one should ever give up hope for a better family life.

I enjoy working with parents, regardless of what they have done in the past or how difficult their situations may appear on the surface.  While many shy away from “high conflict” families, I tend to embrace them, especially when I can work one on one with them.  Why?  Why do I do it?  It can certainly be painful and stressful.  It is often hard to watch parents who are hurting their children.  Many of them do not even realize their part in the struggle, but for those who take the little seed that I plant and let it grow, the results are amazing.  For that reason, even if there might only be a handful in hundreds, I am compelled to continue working with parents.  Once someone works through pain, trauma, abuse or anger and recognizes their own piece in the relationship puzzle, their eyes are opened.  They cannot un-know what they know.  They cannot undo the past, but they can create their future.  It is a blessing to see and the effects are not just in them, but ripple to others, children, friends, neighbors, and the community.  Parents willing to self reflect out of  pain and into peace to be awesome role models for their children are the greatest parents I know and I admire them deeply!

Please go see the movie, “I Can Only Imagine”.  I can already see the greatness within, even simply from getting a couple of minutes worth of a glimpse.  Have a glimpse of faith and hope.  I pray it plants a seed in you!

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Compassionate Eyes

Part of teaching the High Conflict Diversion Program is to help parents learn to have some compassion for their child’s other parent.  It is very hard to do, especially when they seem to go out of their way to make your life miserable, but learning to have compassion for them is not really about them.  It is about freeing yourself from the wounds of your past and moving into a new future.  You may not have control of the court battle, but you can control the future path you travel.

I know that many people enduring any prolonged conflict carry within them a lot of anger, hurt, resentment and pain.  Sometimes we lash out at other people because of those feelings and emotions.  It isn’t healthy to live life this way for very long.  Stress and anger have deep effects on our mental and physical health.  Those who continue living in the pain are more likely to repeat these patterns, or get stuck right where they are in life, waiting until something magical frees them.  What they do not know is that the key to their freedom is within them.  No one else can free you.  You have to be willing to learn and grow and move away from that pain and into the freedom of a new life.  It takes a willingness, some time, and an active effort to get there.

The following video is an awesome example of how to see people with compassion.  You cannot know what is going on within your friends, neighbors, coworkers, or even your ex.  We like to believe that we know the inner workings of our ex, and we may understand a great deal about them, but once we are no longer married to that person, we only think we know.  Deep down there may be reasons for their behavior or reasons why they cannot move forward with their own life.  You may never know what those reasons are.  By treating them compassionately, you can start to empathize with them.  You do not have to like them.  You do not have to help them, but it would serve everyone well, even your children, if you could say, I am going to move away from this bitterness and have a happier life, regardless of what the other parent does.  If you don’t know, the best revenge on an ex is to live a happy life.  Happiness comes from giving others the benefit of the doubt when they behave badly, seeing your part in any conflicts and taking steps to correct that, and to be the best person that you possibly can.  You will be an example for your children and you can teach them compassion by showing them how it is done.

Please watch this fantastic video from Fellowship Bible church in Arkansas.  Make it go viral, please!

More Court Import to Report

Oh, my gosh, where do I start???

There are so many things happening in Minnesota Family Courts.  Somethings I can report and some I cannot report just yet, but stay tuned.

In today’s news, here is a new blog that seems very informative for people in the throws of Family Court System.  I used to tell people that I felt as though I had been thrown in prison, even though I had committed no crime, other than to get divorced.  Anyway, here’s the blog (they picked up the Michelle MacDonald unlawful detainment, too):

<a href="http://www.familylawcourts.com/bailiffs.html
“>www.familylawcourts.com/bailiffs.html


Also, I know I keep repeating myself about Michelle MacDonald, mighty warrior, but she is.  There is a hearing on Friday in the civil rights case against Judge David Knutson in the Sandra Rucki case.  This is something to watch as it can have far reaching implications across the nation.  Families should not be in the court system for years and have their children swallowed up by it.  If you are not in it, don’t go there!  If you are in it, do everything you can to get out.  Now.  If you need help, I can share some strategies with you!  My contact info is above (on the header).

If you’d like to know more about the Rucki case and the Federal lawsuit against Judge Knutson, here are some videos to watch:

Last, but certainly not least, do not forget to watch Divorce Corp the movie, January 10, 2013-January 16, 2013.

http://www.divorcecorp.com/